THE BIRD (2008)

You're the bird
most rare of
all the sightings
Tiny wings
along with Spring
I found you
and Winter brings
no sign of you
I search within
wandering through
Talk to you
feelings not withstanding
As I steal my way
through foggy gray
landmines seem to guide me
Landscapes of the Earth
Landscape universe.

G. Kevin Clark
2008

Christmas Memory

I remember one Christmas, Kevin received a guitar for Christmas. I was commissioned to wrap it and what a job that proved to be. I didn't wrap it following the lines of the guitar case. That would have been too easy to guess. So, I used all the wrapping tricks I knew to disguise the guitar, using boxes and very large pieces of yule-patterned paper & ribbons. What a great surprise.

Years later, I remember receving a guitar myself as a gift; one of my very favorite ever. It was perfect. I can't remember if Russ tried to disguise it, but it had the desired effect either way...tears filled my eyes - it was unexpected and treasured.

I'm sure that boy is somewhere playing tunes on his guitar. I listen for them. :)

Slow Suicide

When I heard they
found you in the street
unconscious
I knew you wanted out...
slow suicide
I knew you had finally
given up
On yourself,
the world,
your life.
You lost everything
that society says
defines you
wife,
job,
income.
But when
you lost your license,
ability to 'fly'
and they
wanted to put
you in a cell
incarcerated,
it was over.
no freedom,
no life,
no living.
You were gone.

People think the
alcohol did it,
but it was just
the instrument
of your
destruction,
your weapon
of choice.

People don't
get
that it's our
insides
that destroy us or...
save us.
Our interior,
our mind,
our emotions.
It's so hard
to slay a dragon
that lies within,
hiding
insidious
cunning
You must have
eyes that
look inward
instead of outward,
toward instead of
away
from
in order to see.
Most of us
are blind about
ourselves...
lost,
helpless.
We're dying
every day
by believing
the lies
we've been told
about ourselves
instead of the truth
of who we are.
We become
disconnected.
We each have our
own story.
Your story ended,
I think, with
a case of
terminal
hopelessness.

(I am so sorry you
didn't understand how
beautiful you were/are)


(You are probably
full of hope now, a light
radiating; warm & soft;
sweet & golden; loved
and loving. You are
certainly loved from
here ♥ )

Please add anything you want to say

A Memory, a thought, a picture, a feeling!

Thanks.

Love you!

Kevin and the getaway

Once upon a time there was a getaway
faraway in the tropics, where the water was warm, the sun shone all the time,
the shade of the coconut palms blocked out your worries and you were left alone
to do as you pleased...swim, scuba dive, fly in a seaplane, frolic with the dolphins,
get a tan, or simply stick your toes in the sand and wiggle them to ensure you
still experienced simple joy.

Surreality

It's surreal,
like you're still here
warm & alive,
right around the corner
or in the next state,
heart beating
charismatic smile
mischievous eyes
in St. Louis
or the Keys
playing hide
and seek.

You're hiding, but
I don't really
want to seek you
because I know
you can't be found,
not on this planet,
maybe in the ethers,
in Spirit.

Even though
I am sure there
is life after death,
that you are
partying with
the other family
angels,
I cry selfish tears
because I miss you,
your human-ness,
the flesh of you,
though I know
you are right
where you are
meant to be.

Even though I didn't
see you often,
I loved you always,
A grand canyon
heart of love.

You can't be gone
because I spoke
to you not that
long ago.
We laughed,
reminisced,
shared,
you were lucid
that time.

If I call your
cell, surely you'll
answer
with some wise
guy remark
some soft
laughter.
But, no you
won't pick up,
not because it's busy
because there's nobody
home
anymore.

♥ I love you ♥

My first memory of Kevin was one Christmas Eve in New Jersey. It was cold and snowy and we stayed in most of the day. It was starting to get dark and Kevin hadn't done his Christmas shopping yet.
Right before the drugstore across the street closed, he went in and bought amazing gifts for everyone, even me, who he just met. I remember being so surprised that he did all of his shopping in 15 minutes and got great stuff that everyone loved.

Good Times

Kevin at home chillin; Good times
That's lil Kelsey with Carol

Grease Monkeys

Kev & John,

hangin' in the hood,

okay, under the hood.

Greasemonkeys, figuring

out the problem,

engine geeks,

a little work, a little

play,

a little laughter, a

little cursing,

carz...yeah.

How I Remember Kevin

How I Remember Kevin

The Photo Ham ; )

These were taken on a canoe trip the family took. Was this Iowa??? Kev on the right - famous pose!

On the left, yuckin' it up while he was row...row...rowing his boat gently

down the stream. ♥

Final Companion

She was his last

constant companion

day in

day out

watching, touching,

seeing,

loving

She stayed until he

left,

seceded

from the planet

as agonizing as

that was,

making sure he

had what he needed,

words, company,

comfort,

someone to hold

his hand,

the last bits of

his life,

precious time,

painful time.

thank you, Kerry

he does too.

Who, Me?

I remember
that "Who, Me?" look;
that so guilty
but professing
innoncence look.
He had it
down.
He'd throw his
hands up & out to
the side
with this
how-can-you-
even-think-I-did-
that face;
eyebrows raised,
question marks
for eyes
Yeah, he was
kind of a drama
king when it
came to things
like this.''

♥ I miss it ♥